The transition from small to medium-sized company means a smart, roomy head office but extra management challenges
One of the most popular of the zillions of iPad apps available for download is Office Jerk. It involves flicking chocolate muffins at various speeds and angles at an annoying work colleague.
The fact that it has been such a huge success clearly suggests that many people are surrogately re-enacting things they would like to mete out to someone in their own office. Until recently, I've always believed that the boss should sit in an open-plan space with the team and that whoever the book-keeper is becomes a figure of loathing. The reason? The financier often gloats in the power conferred by deciding who gets paid and when. The simple solution is to pick women for this role because they tend not to make it testosterone-driven.
I've had nephews do summer jobs at my restaurant and they tell me that the quiet, well-mannered, smooth functioning of activities while I am there turns into a mini-party as soon as I am out. It's a cheaper and less obvious way to find out what's really going on than installing surveillance cameras but obviously I don't dob the boys in by saying: "Firas tells me you're always making fun of Jack when I'm out – stop it." In a way, I'd rather have not known.
Since I stopped using PAs a couple of years ago (what bliss not to have someone know where you are at all times) a pecking order has emerged on who sits closest to me. I like to natter when I'm in and try to limit the disruption this causes by burdening the person at the next desk along. But this causes resentment among others and makes them feel out of favour.
There's only about 10 of us in head office – probably not a large enough number for office politics to ensue – but often it's the perception of politics rather than its actual existence that's the problem, and I'm pleased we don't have an "office jerk" at whom his colleagues dream of throwing things.
But the business is growing in different directions, and after 20 years of having my own companies, it's time to become more grown up. So we've found new, larger premises where I will have my own space and also a boardroom.
In a way, it's a relief that I won't have to hear everyone's conversations or wonder why certain people misinterpret a request to chase a supplier to mean emailing them, or ask why the sommelier is reprinting the wine list for the third time in the last 10 days. I will be able to speak more freely and not need to go to the restaurant if someone wants a private chat, which isn't really private either.
The transition from being a small business to a medium-sized one means our various operations will have to be more carefully managed, which is probably better for everyone else if they can conduct their activities divisionally but will take away part of my freedom as I will need to be there a lot more. I will no doubt be nagged at by our accountants, who refer to "head office costs" disparagingly as if the people there are taking away from the company's profitability rather than enhancing it.
There's a cosy charm in having a workplace environment that is packed to the rafters. But members of the team have been asking me for a while now for a new, bigger space and now that we're about to have one, the very same people who lobbied for it are saying they will miss the old one. I've let them design their work spaces so I won't have to hear any moaning from them, and the deal was that I would design my room for reciprocal reasons.
This step-up is a metaphor for the management of transitional growth. It will mean hiring more people and I guess I will have less interaction with them than I have in the past.
It's been a fair few years since I've socialised with employees and I've only ever attended one company Christmas party. That was 10 years ago at The Cinnamon Club, when I said I would cook for everyone there (I cut my finger early on in the ill-fated project and relegated my role to that of bandaged waiter instead).
It's a hugely exciting time and I am taking on many new commercial challenges – fresh processes as well as new projects. Let's hope there is wisdom in the saying that good fences make good neighbours.
